RESOLUTIONS TO GO!

.....breaking into the new year. A depserateanglohousewife's way.

Our society, regardless of women's growth, is masculine.
Don't stop reading!! This is not a feminist rant!!!!!

We seem to be continuously striving to win, to be the best, to be super slim with zero wrinkles, to earn the most money possible, to have a bigger car, to "upgrade" relentlessly, to get to "the top" ( just where is that on the map?)...ultimate success being measured by the degree of $$$$ rather than inner happiness. The money scale in itself is a male instrument.

How many are we to have set up lists of incredible resolutions only to have them whittled away by procrastination, family obligations, work demands, and lack of time and energy.

 There I am almost every January 1st, full of intention...I sleep in thereby putting off new 2  lap sprint around Jardin Public. My children are starving and need feeding...I eat a bowl of comfort Carbonnara Pasta with them, then another bowl, I eat dessert, I eat dessert again and again and again, I bake them cakes and cookies and throw down a few myself.

I iron all afternoon until I realise I have about 80 essays to mark for 8am Monday morning so race up to my office and panic my way through a time- impossible task. By now my heart is beating too fast, can feel that telltale pulse going in my forehead....I start yelling at everyone "the house is a pigsty, do I have " slave" tatooed on my forehead? "

I look at myself in passing in a bathroom mirror and see a middleaged wreck in need of bionic botox, serious hairdressing and a military diet regime. Decidedly time for a drink...and even that makes me feel guilty ( french men!!!) so I procure little or no enjoyment from my glass of wine....happy new year!

I have decided to look into my feminine self to decipher what I really want from 2010. Away with mind bending plans towards increased financial power, relentlesss exercise and diet programmes. I am going to try and "get there" the peaceful way.

My goals are to improve my physical and mental well-being...if I want to go further in other domains this is where I should probably kick off.

1. Eat , but don't be a pig!
I am going to work on adding more good food rather than depriving myself and becoming obsessive!! I will set aside a time for dessert...or just have it once. Have it once but not twice. When I tell myself " I can't " I only want it more and end up pigging out. Food is my passion so I am going for moderation rather than deprivation...and just watch me slim down!!


2. Time Out for me
Avoiding mega guilt for doing something for yourself as the iron mountain piles up is a source of frustration for most mothers/women. Whether its a long bath, shopping retail, meditation, talking to a friend, self-inviting yourself for coffee, cultural enlightenment...go there and go there more than once a week. You don't owe anyone and explanation either!!

3. Moving & Calcium
Moving is not limited to mopping the floor and cleaning the loo. As women we need both movement and certain amounts of calcium to preserve our bones. If you can't afford a gym, here I am talking $ not time, leave your car at home and walk more. Walking is considered one of the better forms of sport for women..so is swimming. We also need between 1000 - 1500mgs of calcium per day. That can be yoghurt, milk, cheese...but its vital.

4. Think "out of the box"
Get out of your rutt!
I often say " no, I would love to but I'm too busy, too tired, have too much to do at home, have to clean the house, have to do my grading, can't afford to, blah blah blah...."
STOP!!!! Get out, say yes, go!! The more you do the more you CAN do!

5. Purify your environment
Throw out junk...its clutter and you don't need it. That goes for people too....stop trying to be friends with people you don't even like or who bring you down. Life is too short. Stop arguing, stop trying to please and above all get over the past. Move on.

6. Cultivate what you love
People who do what they love doing are always admired by others.They also tend to be  "successful." Cultivate what you love by doing what you love and being surrounded by those you love. This probably sounds a bit corny but its true.

 May 2010 be a great vintage for you, one of many.