A Thousand RECIPE LIST

scroll down to mentioned posts for full recipes...


Gooey Lemon Lime Salted Butter Slice ( Toys - manual or machine post)

Asparagus Appero Velouté ( A Thousand and One Things to do with Aparagus)

Oeuf Mollet ( A Thousand and One Things to do with Aparagus)

Fresh Asparagus ( A Thousand and One Things to do with Aparagus)

Strawberry Fool (Temperatures Rising post)

Death and Co (Desperate Target post)

Susie's Tian ( Summer Bliss post)

Spiced Up Chocolate Mousse ( Mummy Porn? post)

Bay Leaf and Lemon Roasted Coquelet ( Pizza Face post)

Cottage Cheese Salad ( Ouch! post)

Sunday Chilli ( Co Co CO Communication post)

Resolution Chicken Soup ( Sunshine and Joy post)

6 Minute Succulent Foie Gras ( Foie Gras Shortcut post)

Carrot & Coconut Spiced Soup ( Charm and Charme post)

Amaretto Chocolate Cake ( Autumn Dash post)

Sunday Supper Fettucini ( Haircut Hell post)

Susie's Fennel Seed and Lime Chicken (The Gracious Art of Meditation post)

Nigella's Coconut Rice ( The Gracious Art of Meditation post)

Cherry Tomato Curry ( The Gracious Art of Meditation post)

Old Fashioned ( Navigation Nightmares post)

End of Summer Apple Tart (Keeping Up post)

Warm Ravioli du Dauphiné Salad ( Cold Summer, Warm Salad post )

Pecorino, Tuna, Fresh Basil and Summer Tomato Salad (Salad Days post)

Easiest Dreamiest Dark Chocolate Ice cream ( Beware Pigeon post)

Ginger Kisses ( Mmmwah Mmmwah Dahling! post)

A "Lucky Stiff" Cocktail ( Are we all chambermaids ? post)

Blueberry, Banana, Carrot Smoothie ( Get Thin, Get Thin, Get Thin post)

Chilled Cucumber and Coriander Soup ( Husbands who do Housework post)

Pear, Almond, Dark Chocolate Spiced Coffee Cake ( Go Dutch! post)

Orgasmic Dark Chocolate and Lime Zest Gateau (Loss is Plus post)

Warm Parsnip Salad (Season's Parsnip post)

Champagne and Raspberry Gratin(Champagne! post)

Laksa ( Getting On post)

Cheat's Christmas Cake ( Last Minute Madness post)

Pecan Pie ( The Joy of "Thanks" post )

Flourless Dark Chocolate Almond Brownies ( Antumn Brownie post)

Christmas Chocolate Truffle Fudge Cake ( Christmas... Already ? post )

Foie Gras Sauternes Terrine ( Oh, To be a Duck post )

Fig Pear Apple Spiced Almond Crumble ( Linguistic LOL post )

Pepper, Fresh Tomato,Garlic, Serrano, Pasta Shells ( God Give us Parity post)

Lemon Ginger Hot Toddy for Colds ( Husbands with Colds post)

Autumn Tomato Soup ( Big Noise post)

Chocolate Mountain Crisp Cookies ( working, WORKING, Mothering, Exploding post)

Inspired Chicken Liver Paté ( Everything's Gone Retro post)

Spiced Apple Yoghurt Cake, Lemon Butter Icing ( Body Balance post )

Raspberry, White Peach and Limoncello Cups ( Disdain and More Summer Pudding #3 post )

Very Berry Summer Pudding ( Very Berry, Summer Puddings #2 post )

Minted Peach Soup ( Back to School, Summer Puddings #1 post )

Full Fibre Toasted Muesli ( World Cup Fever? post)

Energy Spring Salad ( Energy Spring Salad post)

Chicken Breast Tossed in Basilled Gremolato (Gremolato GOGO post)

Osso Bucco ( Monday Osso Bucco post)

Moistest Almond Expresso Cake with Coffee Butter Icing ( The Cake Which Gets you What you Want...Anything! post)

Red Pepper Tomato Tuna Pasta Bake (Pasta Bake for really Frustrated Mothers post )

Spring Strawberry & Blueberry Spiced Crumble (Dessert for a Spring Evening post )

Quinoa Asparagus Feta Salad (Annual Cringe post)

Lavender Dream Ice Cream ( Lavender Dream post)

Nasturtium, Cream Cheese & Ham Sandwiches ( Flower Power post)

Best Potato Salad Ever ( First Spring BBQ post)

Basil, Chive, Goat Cheese Stuffed Portobello Mushrooms ( Portobello Fresh post)

Balsamic Berry Salad ( Berry Power post)

Moist Raspberry and Lemon Zest Dessert Cake ( pre Wedding Supper post )

Mackerel Crumble (Omega Me post)

NYC Pecan and Choc Chip Cookies (MyAmericanMarket.com post)

Stawberry and Cherry Tomato Salad with Basil and Mint ( Salad Days post)

Spring Detox Smoothie ( Incredible Blimp post )

Baked Cinnamon and Orange Zest Cheesecake( On Cheesecake post)

Blood Orange Braised Endives (Beautiful Blood Oranges post )

Egg Free Choc Mousse ( Orgasmic Choc Mousse post)

Timeless Onion Soup ( Mid-Term Suppers post)

Caper, Red Onion & Bacon Tart ( Late Lunch Tart post )

Dale's Poisson Cru ( Don't Tell Them its Raw post )

Duck Sausage Curry ( Mid Week Bangers post )

Easy Crepes with various toppings (Its "Crepe Day" in France post)

Red Onion Tart (Winter Suppers Again - Classic Red Onion Tart post )

Classic NYC Bloody Mary ( Hangover Brunch Cure post)

Pesto Salmon (more Winter Suppers, Pesto Salmon post)

Soothing Lemon Soufflé ( Winter Suppers - Back to easy desserts post )

Mash and Variations (Winter Suppers 3 - The Glory of Mashed Potato post)

Braised Vegetable Hot Pot with Espelette Chicken ( see Winter Suppers 2 post)

French Apple Tart, Unadulterated ( Supper for Winter Term 1 post)

Spicey Chorizo Tomato Spaghetti ( Supper for Winter Term 1 post)

Veal/Veau Orloff, Julia Child (Just what is Veau Orloff post)

Christmas Detox Hints ( Over Christmas post)

Espuma Roquefort, Celery, Panacetta (We Workshopped post) Mille Feuilles Sud Ouest (We Workshopped post)

Gourmet Classic Egg Nog (Christmas Spirit post)

Lemon Roasted Chicken (ps More on Backdoor post)

Mrs Wood's Heavenly Honey Cake ( Mrs Wood's Heavenly Honey Cake post)

Black Ink Spaghetti with Shellfish (Spaghetti al Nero di Seppia post)

Boeuf Bourguignon, Simple ( Food is Love post)

Smoked Salmon, Dill, Cream Cheese Scrambled Eggs (One Plate Brunch post)

Heavenly Green Soup ( Things Green post)

Dark Chocolate & Chestnut Muffins ( see Sunday Muffin post)

Rhubard, Cardomom & Lime Muffins ( Sunday Muffin post)

Date, Walnut & Marscapone, Lemon Zest Muffins (Sunday Muffin post)

Apple , Pecan, Toasted Rolled Oats Muffins (Sunday Muffin post)

Susie's Red Wine Sausage Hot-Pot ( see Perspectives Men & Women post)

Mother's Pumpkin Soup ( see 70's Orange post)

Mimosa ( see Back to Brunch post )

Chestnut Panna Cotta

Artichoke Risotto

Risotto alla milanese/Saffron Risotto

Susie's Side Artichokes

Slow Poached Figs with Amaretti Biscuits

Janice's Fig Preserves ( see Getting Figgy post)

Chicken and Prawn Thai Green Curry

Mother's Waldorf Salad

Cherry Tomato and Pistachio Deep Dish Tart

Walnut Tart

Green Crunch Salald

Gorgonzola & Parsley Fettucini

Berry Pavlova

Susie's Pesto - Parsley and Walnut, Basil and Pinenut

Tomato Home-Tapenade Poached Chicken Easy Tart

Susie's Comfort Risotto

Pat's Basil & Corn Soup

Susie's Raspberry & Lemon Zest Tiramisu

Chicken Stock

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Desperateanglohousewives has the goal to network with local, offshore women and men from all over the globe.

The writer, Susie, an offshore kiwi, is an avid food and lifestyle fanatic who wishes to share her passion for cuisine, culture and laughter. Susie brings you her weekly lifestyle comments and recipes of the moment.

Your comments count! Please click onto the comments section at the end of any post. We would also love to know what part of the world you are from...
Foodbuzz
living in France

Monday, 20 February 2012

OUCH!

Spring is in the air...no more hair!

Buds on the trees, no more snow.
Spring is in the air.


Time to start starving myself, depriving myself of those extra grease-filled calories so that I am brave enough to put on a swimsuit in public..2 months and counting!


But that's not all.
This is also the time of the year when I start slinking past the estheticians checking out the waxing prices...OUCH!


Being quite " fair" this was one of life's tortures I managed to get away from for a very long time. But now at 40-something,there's no running, just screaming!!


The french are obsessed with waxing. If its got hair, wax it!


I remember, with horror, the first trip to the local salon d'epilation..I was there for a mere eye-brow tweak. A woman, who resembled the Brunhilda of my nightmares came out every 5 minutes to call up the next victim, a bit like a school dental nurse..
Mme Dupont, half leg wax...Mme Faure, full leg please....Mme Gigot, eyebrows, upper lip and...chin, Mme Fleurot, bikini and Mme Roget, full arm wax, Mr Thirot, back wax please..and the list went on.
 Everyone else was flicking through Elle and Paris Match. I was sitting there, my kiwi eyes on stalks, trying to, well, " hair spot!"


 Until recently I was just a mere eyebrow client but after hearing my girlfriends after a few glasses of spring chardonnay chatting about their bikini waxes, and seeing looks of horror when I confessed my " virginity," I knew it was time!! 


Now let me be clear here, it was not the pain that worried me. Not at all. I'm afraid to admit it was my terribly anglo-saxon pudeur or sense of modesty that had me reeling. That and the terrible fear of boiling wax being dripped in all the wrong places..


I have a great beautician in Bordeaux. Her name is Leonilda (she is on Place Paul Doumer if anyone is interested)..Leo is Brazillian and by way of word association I thought she would be my safest torturer. I went in to book..oh god, I was so embarrased I couldn't even look her in the eye. Although I asked for an appointment for 2023 she whisked me straight out the back. 


It wasn't actually THAT bad....until Leo said, Susie would you like me to wax your anus ? Although I was frozen with terror my polite ango-saxonisms took over...No I wouldn't, but thank you for asking.



This will sound absurd to anyone living in NZ, Australia, USA, England...but I have just discovered that we can now buy cottage cheese in France. No excuses now...back to cottage cheese salads to prepare the warpath to my bathing suit!!


Cottage Cheese Salad


1 punnet cottage cheese (200gr)
chopped chives
chopped cucumber
sliced avocado
squirt of lemon juice plus some zest
splash of toasted sesame oil

rough ground black pepper
malden salt

13 comments:

  1. Brilliantly funny post about bikini waxing!!So got the anglo pudeur When are you going to write a book, you are the funniest woman on the web.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anglo saxon pudeur has a lot going for it! Waxing the anus indeed!
    But anglo saxon manners have a lot going for them too...your polite no thank you was a gem!

    It always puzzled me that I couldn't get cottage cheese in France...now I can't get it in Costa Rica...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Superb! What a dreadful question. I would have frozen, speechless.

    ReplyDelete
  4. @ Melanie. Yes it certainly was not one of the options I had imagined on offer. Although I am told that bleaching is all the rage in California. ARGH!!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ahhh so much I want say to this one Susie, but I think I will have that conversation with you in a non public forum ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ah, life in France...never without surprises. We all have our stories to tell. Love the cottage cheese recipe. Thanks

    ReplyDelete
  7. Ok so your blog makes me laugh but this week I was on the floor !

    ReplyDelete
  8. Shocked me? LMAO heck no, quite the opposite! More that I could join in the conversation :-)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Great post Susie

    ReplyDelete
  10. For me it isn't just the Anglo Saxon pudeur (I quite concur with that) but rank cowardice as well. Cowardice as well as a dislike of presenting my bumps in public will be preventing me from donning a swimsuit in two months - it'll still be April for heaven's sake!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I have just discovered your blog through Fly and have loved reading down to here. You will understand that the only thing I really need to comment on is WHERE DO YOU FIND COTTAGE CHEESE AND WHAT IS IT CALLED :-)

    ReplyDelete
  12. @ Rosie ...it is called, wait for this....Cottage cheese! It is found at all the big Auchans. Good luck.
    Susie

    ReplyDelete

We so look forward to reading your comments.....

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La Bocca, rue Notre Dame

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Marché St Michel, Pl St Michel, Saturday mornings






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